If you’re thirsty, get a drink.

I was brought up to have a strong work ethic.

I am an Eagle Scout. I went to college on an Army ROTC scholarship. I studied until I brought my SAT score up to a respectable level. I didn’t stop until I got what I needed or until time ran out.

And that’s a good thing. Had I not achieved Eagle Scout or earned an ROTC scholarship, my life would certainly be different than it is now.

Not better or worse, just different. In the way that small ripples in the past make enormous differences in the future. The Butterfly Effect. Marty McFly. That sort of thing.

Point is, my work ethic made me who I am today.

And I always thought there couldn’t be a downside to that. I never thought there might be negative consequences to having a strong work ethic.

I was wrong…

I attribute my burnout, and all its ramifications, to my unethical work ethic.

You see, while I was proving myself to myself through my strong work ethic, I was beating myself to a pulp in doing so. The way I worked was unethical… to myself.

What I wish I had seen was that I was treating myself poorly. Actually, I was abusing myself. Mentally, physically, emotionally. Because of that, most things in my life suffered. My marriage, my kids, my health.

I didn’t realize it. I wasn’t paying attention. And I was so isolated in the situation that no one knew to offer help. I had sequestered myself to such a level that no one really knew I existed. They knew I was working, but no one could really see me for me.

That didn’t help the burnout either.

I guess what I’m saying is that if you’re hanging your hat on hard work, if you’re planting your flag in the soil of your work ethic, be careful. That ground might be quicksand.

I ask you these questions:

❓ Do you get to a point where you start making mistakes, but you think you can power through?

❓ Do you wake up early to get to work early - earlier than others - to show your work ethic?

❓ Do you “sneak” work? Are you checking your email on your phone when you go to the bathroom because you know your family will be irritated that you’re checking your email at all?

❓ Do you skip lunch to the point that you don’t even remember that it’s a meal?

❓ Do you drink less water so you need to use the bathroom less?

These are signals that can illustrate a strong work ethic. But they are also signals that your work ethic is unethical.

📣 Here’s the question though. WTF do you do about this?

After all, if you don’t get to work early, someone else will. If you don’t check your email at home, you might miss an important detail. If you leave your desk to go to the bathroom, you might miss an important call.

These are all true.

All of them.

True.

And they feel impossible to change, don’t they?

I offer this: You may not be able to change all of this. But you can EASE OFF. Take your foot off the gas.

You can wean yourself off of the email when you’re at home. Put the kids to bed and then check. Did you truly miss anything? Seriously. Did you miss something that will have any consequences?

If you can’t find someone to eat lunch with, shut your door for 15 minutes and watch Weekend Update on YouTube (That’s what I did…). Have a laugh. Calm down.

If you’re not drinking enough water so that you won’t need to go to the bathroom. Well, stop it. That’s an easy one.

I’ll tell you… there is too much at stake here. If you’re working too hard or if you’re spending too much time at work, you have to do something.

Let’s do this… In the next week, I want you to consider the “do you” questions above. If one of those fits you, then use that one. If you have a “do I” question that fits better, use it.

I want you to respond “yes” to that question and then I want you to take action to lessen your burden.

✅ If you need to sleep more, allow yourself 20 more minutes of sleep. It’s just 20 minutes…

✅ If you make a mistake, forget a detail, arrive late to a meeting, admit it to yourself. No judgment. Just say, “yep. That was a mistake.”

✅ If you have an urge to check your email, try to let the urge subside without giving in to it.

🥤 And for God’s sake, if you’re thirsty, take a drink of water.